‘Does YOUR watch tell you what year it is?’ ‘Of course not,’ Alice replied very readily: ‘but that’s because it stays the same year for such a long time together.’

It is hard to see changes.
They sometimes happen so slowly hat they are easy to miss.
Today I told a coworker how I had spent the first thirty years of my life being late for everything.
She was flabbergasted and had a hard time believing me.
That was a nice moment.
I read somewhere the importance of rewards as self motivation.
Of recognizing steps achieved towards a greater goal.
chip, chip, chip away at the stone.
Hand over hand towards the light.

Further down.

I am falling....still.
Losing fingernails trying to stop my descent.
The walls crumble in my grasp as I momentarily forget that I am supposed to be holding on, climbing, struggling, and tumble downward once more. Again.
Any progress lost. Start again again and hope and hope and hope that no one notices
or worse yet are pulled down, down, down with me.
The circle of light above me grows smaller and smaller.