“Begin at the beginning," the King said, very gravely, "and go on till you come to the end: then stop.”

priorities.
so i have reached a fork in the road in this journey.
a fork that i have come across before. It is a fork that forks and keeps on dividing and spreading out like the delta of a river.
and time anda again I find myself standing at these moments of choice na do not know which direction to head...
The inability to choose is not choosing not to chose. uncertainty is not stoicism.
or i am running head long and notice only periferally that I am totally forked.
so, I have to get my head around my priorities somehow...
no neat little tricks or apps or advice today..
just a confused and rambling question that i think lies at the heart of this whole thing.
where to begin?
all the time, every day.
what should i do now?

sadly i am often left feeling like this guy.

and though he has tried really hard to get organized and put a lot of time and effort into developing a system (and looks pretty happy)...
  he has no idea which direction he is heading.

"I don't want to go among mad people..."

I would like to interject that I am embarking on this journey of self discovery and improvement whilst I am home on paternity leave with my three year old and my one and a half year old sons. The youngest is sitting beside me as I type... spitting on my sleek Macbook Pro keyboard in order to get my attention.
His older brother, the three year old, is playing dj by starting and restarting Your Wife is Calling by punk legend  Lee Ving over and over again. 1234, 1234. 1234,1234..ad infinitum.
I am not making excuses just providing context,
   and not for you, but for me.
I saw this today and it made me think.

I have been struggling with how slowly change seems to be taking place.
I am perpetually frustrated by this.
Case in point: I have been reading Four Weeks to an Organized Life for the better part of two weeks now and have only successfully completed three days of the program...
this frustrates and disappoints me.
I get frustrated and disappointed in myself.
so...kindsight.
progress is slow
and so I will chip away at the rock of myself to reveal the me underneath..
but I wont do it alone. I can't. I have tried. I have failed. I have beaten myself up about it.
so what i have learned?

I have learned that I cant do this alone...I get too distracted.
(Ba-dum-tiss)

And so I have joined Attention, a study group of sorts here in Karlstad that focuses on ADHD issues of all shapes and sizes. I am looking for a support group.
I have also contacted Andrea from the fantastic blog The Art of ADD. Andrea works as a life coach. I am not certain what this means per say but I know that it means some sort of support.

Today's goals:
Create a week schedule version 1.0
Chip away at my new office space for twenty minutes
Update the blog. yay!

“It's always tea-time.”

I have  a new tool and i am using it right now.

It is intended to induce the state of last minute panic productivity at will.

Drink up, drink up, Move down, MOVE DOWN!

....is what i think to myself. 

The suggestion comes from Four Weeks to a an Organized Life by Jeffery Freed and Joan Shapiro.

very practical advice: time limits and visualisation so far. 

So, i have eight minutes left to blog after looking for cool pics of of the mad hatter at teatime. 

My self imposed time limit means that i settle for this pic which i know is not the best picture of a Mad Hatter Clock on the internet...hmmm...so many thinks.
Is it better to settle and get things done or try to do things exactly as i think that they should be done but not actually get them done? 

That, i think, is the entire point. Three minutes. This twenty minute tea time approach is going to be implemented when it comes to keeping this blog updated. One minute left. I have many more things on my mind but many other things to get done today. Next post: The Art of ADD and life coach Andrea.